My perspective at the moment

Zoe, who channels the guidance for this blog, (I ask the questions of the spirit guides and type it up) has been encouraging me to write about my personal experience of having a fourth recurrence of stage 4 cancer. I have felt reticient about this for a number of reasons: 1) this blog is not about my thoughts but rather chanelled information from a group of spirit guides,2)I feel quite vulnerable sharing my thoughts, emotions and fears. However, I have decided to do so and the following post is by me, about me, for you. So, very different from the rest of the content on this blog. In October 2011, a routine scan picked up cancer nodules in my lungs, breast cancer secondaries, I was terrified as I understood that the medical community believed that breast cancer secondaries are "incurable" and can also spread fast. This was the situation that I had been dreading ever since I was first diagnosed with early breast cancer 8 years before, although I had had a second and third recurrence in the intervening years these had been isolated tumours not crazy all over the place cancer. I became more and more terrified as the cancer worsened really quickly despite all my efforts. I was soon struggling to walk or stand and my hips were very painful. The cancer had eaten holes in my hips (and other places to)o and it was widespread thorughout my skeleton. I could hardly breathe as I had several litres of water on my lungs and was vomitting alot. The treatment I was on really hit my immune system and I had several emergency blood transfusions and admissions to hospital, additionally I couldn't face food or water. Looking back I don't know how I kept going but I did, even when nothing appeared to be working. I had and still have the knowing that anything can be cured or healed. There is evidence (from a number of case studies on all types of illness) to suggest this is the case but my knowledge of energy medicine and trust in the power of God shored up this belief. There are far too many knock backs, needles and being cut up to mention but things got worse when a brain scan showed I also had cancer on my brain. I felt I had really hit rock bottom and was terrified of the conventional treatment offered to me and also terrified of this monster attacking my brain and how that might affect me. I decided not to tell people as I thought it would freak them out. As usual, my emotional crash did subside and real anger and a "how dare it" attitude kicked in. I had had enough and was even more determined to become completely healthy. I upped my natural healing regime and really tried to surrender to the will of God, whatever that be. The healing from my healer in Forres was helping as was the new chemo I was on. I was really helped by reading, "Dying to be me" by Anita Moorjani. It describes an incredible near death expereince after she almost died from cancer. After coming back to life, out of a coma, her body recovers completely from cancer. Her message, amongst others, is to surrender and love yourself. I had my own amazing miracles in the latter part of 2012 with the cancer healing comepletely from my brain and lungs. I cannot explain how amazing that felt and how unbelievable it felt too. I am so grateful for my body's ability to heal and it has demonstrated it can do brillaince things! However, since then it has become more active in my lungs again. This has really scared me and made me question my faith in my ability to heal and whether I am just plain mad. Luckily, there are enough people to reassure and support me. Although, I find it really painful and upsetting to hear about others with cancer whose situation deteriorates or who pass over. Especially, friends. I remind myself that everything is temporary and to see them in their divine light as beautiful strong beings. At the moment I am working on getting as healthy as possible and raising my vibration by experiencing as much love and gratitude as I can. A recent course with Sandra Ingerman (shaman from New Mexico) helped keep me on track with my manifestation tools and decreeing that, "I am well" rather than petitioning for wellness. But it is all really tough on so many levels and in so many ways. My biggest challenge is enormous fear and staying in a space of surrender and love and gratitude.

22: Causes of cancer: enviromental or emotional?

FIONA HERE: this dialogue was recorded over a year ago before I was diagnosed with the recurrence of cancer from which I am currently healing. I think it is very useful for all sorts of situations and a very good reminder for me. ======================================================================================================================== FIONA: I am thinking about the causes of cancer. Some say it is caused by toxic emotions; others that it is caused by environment toxins. Can you shed any light on this? GUIDES: Yes. We take you back to what we initially said on this subject. Cancer is one of the ways the body will choose as a means to exit life. When you are looking to exit life the body will begin to accumulate matter in the body as the system becomes sluggish towards life in general. Think about it. You move less when you are unhappy and your thoughts become far more polluted in their nature. The mechanisms for exit can be physical in nature. But by the time they become physical in nature, such as the body has manifested a mass or masses, which can be diagnosed as cancer, there has been a great build up to this point. Although it seems to those of you diagnosed it has been overnight, there has been a build up towards this. Now all of you are right in thinking that it is a genetic issue, and that it is a mental issue, and that it is a toxic issue. The mechanism that causes the manifestation of disease in the individual is individual. But what must be noticed is the commonality with all of you that end up with a diagnosis of cancer, is that there has been an activation of the desire to exit life. For most of you this will have been on an unconscious, subconscious level. You will probably not have realised you are doing this so you must look to reclaim your joire de vivre. This is the most important message we can ever give you .You understand this, Fiona. This becomes difficult for you when you see it manifesting in other ways in other people. You have been to the point where you are considering your own mortality and you know how it feels. You know how it feels to try and get a sense of self and a sense of living back. It is hard. It is much easier to become more full of life without a diagnosis of cancer than it is with one. However, should you wish to remain healthy and you have the strength to do so, engage with life. How do you do this? This is individual to each of you. It will be important that all of you think about what you need to do for your healing. If your body has a level of toxicity or pollutants in it, then cleanse it. But do this lovingly- not aggressively- for cleansing the body aggressively simply adds more of the wrong input into the system. What do we mean? It is simply another thing about how bad my life is. We would rather you ate a chocolate bar at this point, if that is what would make you happier. All of you who are willing to do so, please take a look at the contents of your thoughts. You are not taught to think about your thoughts. You are not taught that you are a creator of your thoughts. Instead you are left with a mind that talks and many of you for want of a better word or phrase aren’t aware of the direction you are driving yourself. So when you come to a stop such as a diagnosis of cancer, and you do not wish for your life to end, it is time to turn around.

21: Can energy healing help to cure cancer ?

Hi, Fiona here! I asked these questions of the guides at the end of 2012. Sarah, one of the blog readers suggested them, thanks!! I think they are very interesting. I have and continue to receive various types of energy healing and I believe it has really healped me. ================================================================================== FIONA: Can “spiritual Doctors and [psychic] surgeons” heal physical conditions? GUIDES: Yes. Let us explain how this happens. There is a movement of energy that can be so unique and so transparent that it rewrites what the body, the cell, the organ, is doing. However, the issue here is that the person’s system needs to be able to accept this. How joyful are you? How much can your system sustain energetically? This may seem very, very harsh for some people who would desperately, on reading this, want to find someone who specialises spiritual energetic surgery, who desperately wants to fight for a longer life, a better prognosis? But remember what counts is a better connection with self and how alive do you feel in general. Not all of you at this point are used to having communications with yourself at a deep level and particularly at times when a cancer diagnosis is given or when treatment is undergone. It [prognosis or time undergoing treatment] can have a very disconnecting effect. Where once you might have been able to go within and find answers, the fear of what are facing is enough to disconnect you from the connection you may have once had. As you are all human beings and all mixtures of emotions, we say, “Try everything”! How do you know what you want? It is a bit like an exotic fruit platter, how do you know if it will work for you until you taste it? Now we know this will be controversial in some areas as there is the matter of access to resources. Remember the number one relationship you have is with yourself. The best thing to do is to develop that relationship with self. Choosing things such as chemotherapy is about sustaining that relationship with self as ultimately you choose chemotherapy because you wish to sustain your physical life. It is important that you take all parts of you along with you for that ride; otherwise you could end up, as you know, in an eternal war between wanting and not wanting the medicine. This is the same for any form of treatment. For most of you, things such as healing, people who work with or sense spiritual forces or appear to have spiritual gifts may be on the exotic fruit platter. Try it....but maintain the relationship to self. If you absolutely know you never want to do this and are closed to it then don’t try. If you really are not sure but think you should try then try anyway. If you are willing to try whatever it takes then gorge on the exotic fruit platter. Always keeping a relationship to self and remembering to ask, “Is this right for me?” Remember that your relationship with any practioner, whether a Dr or healer, is of ultimate importance. You must feel good in their company. It is ok to feel challenged in their company but you must feel that they are on your side. This allows you to effectively disarm, this is important especially for energetic interventions. Do you have further questions? FIONA: Do you have to believe in the effectiveness of the healing treatment for it to work? GUIDES: Good question. Do you have to believe in us to read this blog? Do as you wish, accept it, reject it. Listen to your choice in life. Everything is there for you: a healing or an exit plan. We say this with a great deal of mirth. FIONA: What is the best way to choose a spiritual healer? GUIDES: Ask us for help. Start praying to God for miracles. If you believe in God, ask God, if you believe in angels, ask angels. If you believe you are helped by a loved one who has passed over ask them to find the very best on the other side. Or work with a practitioner who has these tools in their toolbox. Unfortunately, at this moment in time you cannot google energy therapists who work with spiritual surgeons and find them as most of them keep this hidden. There are a couple who specialise in this area and promote that. But working with any energy practitioner who is worth their salt will be aligned with your interests therefore will be pulling on resources from spiritual sides and this may include spiritual surgeons. This is not exclusive there are many ways you can utilise spiritual forces to help you heal. Surgery is just the most human of them all. It is a spiritual aspect of what a Dr could do for you. Does this make sense? Within the spiritual realm is everything. Every scientist who walked this earth and ever will, every miracle worker. Pull on it all. When you simply ask for this help and desire it and truly believe, and we mean truly believe then this will be delivered to you. That is the role of Spirit. You can do this by yourself. By lying in bed, in meditation or in prayer, or in nature. You can ask your body to tap into its healing resources as we have described before and it will follow your instructions. Your best relationship is always to yourself. Always the undoing for a human being is an aspect of yourself. So work to deeper states of love, appreciation and self respect. Get help with the aspects of your undoing such as self denial, the person who continues exactly as they were as they undergo treatment or the person who stops everything of their life in order to face this head on. You cannot keep an aspect of yourself separate from the other aspects of you. For that is what you are. You are a mixture of body, mind and spirit. Spiritual Beings in Physical bodies. If you wish to turn around any situation it is useful to utilise all aspects of you. You are at a time in your evolutionary consciousness that you choose to access certain parts more readily than others and for most of you this will mean choosing physical means. For some of you this will include spiritual means but the answers are in the holistic. You cannot separate the spirit from the physical while you are alive: that separation happens in death. Have we gone too far off the topic, Fiona? We suggest that you face things head on. Gather a team of people that you are willing to try and go anyway. There are options for those with limited resources. There are healing groups for those who wish to try healing. There are distance healing groups such as you and Zoe are involved in. Although you to a lesser degree Fiona, you are just a receiver. It works. There are those who will simply help you for it is their calling to help you. FIONA: Can healers permanently cure cancer? GUIDES: You have a modern day person who is famed for this. The spiritual teachers of old were all healers. Your Christian church has taken this and made it holy and given to a few and is associated with those who are saintly. If they are not deemed saintly by the Church then.... The real truth of this from where we see it, remembering that the church is a man made structure, is that all of you are healers in your own bodies. Some of you are excellent healers at triggering the healing effect in others. Does this really exist? Yes. You know this to be true, Fiona. Zoe knows this to be true. Do you wish to put all of your eggs into that basket? If you really want something done, and we pull on your management background here, utilise all avenues open to you. Make the best plan and follow it and you will have the best results. There is no need for people to become addicted to faith healing when previously they only took pain killers, for example. Open all avenues; see what is available to you. When it comes to healers a level of faith that you can heal is very helpful. Not in that healer but in the possibility, call it your body, call it God, call it the healer if you wish. Call it the quantum, we like this. The quantum has no connotation to anything other than great possibility. Tap into the quantum, what does that mean?